Friday, September 10, 2004
whee. he's hot. and i'm flying without wings. he's TOTALLY my type man. haha. grinns. not really. but neh mind. he's so cute. usually i don't like people whom the whole world likes. that's crap. but yeah i LOVE chad. plus his name rocks. haha. chad chad chad chad chad chad chad.
chad chad
he's so rad.
stand next to him
you'll look bad.
HAHAHA. omg. lame attepmt. but it's ok. i only write poems for.. ok. neh mind. late for reality. don't know why i love that phrase. but yeah. the whole idea of fantasy and reality was nice. sometimes i wish that my love life would be like a fairy tale too. but it'll never be. sigh. ahha. life's never a bed of roses. haha. so cliched. eww eww eww. anyway. the song "God of reality" keeps ringing in my head though i don't know the lyrics. and all i'm doing is humming the tune and only know the first line. i'm typing really fast now. cos my time on the comp is almost up. see i'm so guai i can't stand it.
anyway. talking about chad. i love chad. woah. he's a FOOTBALL player. wow.. :) haha. i liiike. football's something like rugby so also can lah horr. but he's 23 and he looks like a teenager. mwahah. he's soo hot. just that i haven't seen his body. haha. whoops. AHHH. HE'S ENGAGED. :'( ahhahaah. i think i'm siao. anyway. he's engaged to this really pretty lady. sophia bush. ahh. know what. he acts in this show called one tree hill. i NEVER knew taht. i'm SOO going to find out what time it it lorr. all i know is that it's on sunday. ok some creep is talking to me. i have NO idea who it is. but i know this person is vulgar and i'm going to block him. or her. prolly a him. but neh mind. who cares. don't want to know who the person is anyway. okok. i so want to be chad's mistress. it's ok. i don't mind playing second fiddle. love him all the same.
haha. he rocks my SOCKS. oh great.. i just found out i got more homework. crap. i got to go. time's up. taa.
so they said.
best.. :)
so they said.
he's hot.
so they said.
peter nicol. woah. he's actually quite cute. in real life. and now. he's got long hair now. he's squash world no.1 been at the top spot for 60 months. woah. :)
so they said.
Thursday, September 09, 2004
Ben, the two of us need look no more
We both found what we were looking for
With a friend to call my own
I'll never be alone
And you my friend will see
You've got a friend in me
(You've got a friend in me)
Ben, you're always running here and there
You feel you're not wanted anywhere
If you ever look behind
And don't like what you find
There's something you should know
You've got a place to go
(You've got a place to go)
I used to say, 'I' and 'me'
Now its 'us', now its 'we'
(I used to say, 'I' and 'me')
(Now its 'us', now its 'we')
Ben, most people would turn you away
I don't listen to a word they say
They don't see you as I do
I wish they would try to
I'm sure they'd think again
If they had a friend like Ben
(A friend)
Like Ben
(Like Ben)
Like Ben.
ahh. i love this song. whee. i love jackson 5. not really. but i like them. though i haven't exactly heard them. but obviously i know they can sing. i'm really tempted to go get their cd. mwahaha. yeah man. so annoyed that beverly and nana didn't in. sigh. i actually voted know! how cool is that. woot. ahha. i know now why sanjie loves michael jackson so much. his voice is really VERY good. woah. but his voice doesn't melt me it just wows me. haha. whee. finally can go out. though it's the end of the holidays ALREADY. it doesn't matter. i just thank God for this VERY short break. but it's ok. sigh. though i didn't really relax as much as i would have liked to. yeah. going to watch garfield tomorrow and a cinderella story. whee. then come home and mug again. haven't gone to orchard the whole of the hols. not really. i kinda did. haha. whee. yeah. ahh. i want to download the song!!
It must have been cold there in my shadow,
to never have sunlight on your face.
You were content to let me shine, that's your way.
You always walked a step behind.
So I was the one with all the glory,
while you were the one with all the strength,
A beautiful face without a name for so long.
A beautiful smile to hide the pain.
Did you ever know that you're my hero,
and everything I would like to be?
I can fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings.
It might have appeared to go unnoticed,
but I've got it all here in my heart.
I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it.
I would be nothing without you.
Did you ever know that you're my hero?
You're everything I wish I could be.
I could fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings
nice song eh. VERY nice. i think i'll forever remember it. haha.
now here i stand with two words for you
it's the least that i could do
with all my heart with all my soul
with everything i could mean
i'd like to say
thank you
-april cheah
3SE
scgs.
talented girl man she. haha. wrote that song. and i'm sure MANY more to come. like for our invest next year. she's been put in charge of invest. ahah. i'm in special unit. -.- haha. whee. but i'm in external now. have i mentioned that. anyway. yeah. another song.
You'll never know, what you've done for me
What your faith in me
Has done for my soul
You'll never know the gift you've given
I'll carry it with me
Through the days ahead
I think of days before
While you made me hope for something better
And made me reach for something more
(chorus)
You taught me to run
You taught me to fly
Helped me to free the me inside
Help me hear the music of my heart
Help me hear the music of my heart
You opened my eyes
You opened the door
To something ive never known before
And you're love
Is the music of my heart
Everywhere i go
and everywhere ive been
You were the one who made me better
Than anyone ever will again......!
You have my heart
My heart
You opened the door
known before and you're love
Is the music of my heart
My heart, is the music of my heart
deedum. yeah. all these were the songs that we sang for the sec4s. know what. we can sing it for teacher's day. at least it's more in point.. haha. whee. yupp. can try next year i guess. deedum. i'm like downloading all these songs. ahh. i still want ben!! no fair. laaaa. i'm hungry. ahah. should go sleep soon eh. yupp. deedum. kk. taaa.
so they said.
Wednesday, September 08, 2004
dumdeedum. yesterday was a horrible night. today was a horrible day. haha. not really. well last night i was all spooked out and stupid. sigh. i feel so stupid. i really need to trust the Lord. as difficult as it is going to be. haiz. i hate myself. i really hate being soo ooba
ren xing. how do i not be ren xing. sigh. fought with my mum today and cried and cried. sigh. poor dylan. yeah. sometimes having short-term memory sucks. haha. i was crying and crying then i decided to stop crying so i decided to read archie comics to make myself laugh. and after reading. i totally forgot what we fought about. come on lah. how stupid is that.
suddenly i feel so hostile and stuff. i hate it when people lie to me. then again. i don't know the whole story. but if i did. i think i'd be more angry with you. you've changed a lot. not changed. but sigh. BOYS. if you ever tell me you're not boy crazy. i'll throw back my head and laugh. come on. please set your priorities right. as in like. we were all slogging carrying stuff and you sat there on the phone!? sigh. i don't know why i'm pissed. think i just totally woke up on the wrong side of the bed. like REALLY wrong side. yeah.
thanks so much. that's something i haven't heard for a really long time. man. guess i won't be seeing you online for a really long time eh. and count on me to pray for you. i'm glad you don't see the worst of things. but yeah. man. i think that situation sucks lah. *huggs* i'll be praying for you too. like thanks soo much. =) that's something i wanted to hear.. haha. that sounds weird. but whatever you think it means. i hope that isn't what i mean. haha. omg. i'm confusing myself.
deedum. you know what. everybody's struggling in school. and i really take comfort that i'm not struggling alone. thank God for friends again. i guess i could look at this holiday as a study break though i don't have one. and think i badly need it. i actually mangaged to study quite a bit today.
i'm trying really hard to pray again. it's so difficult.. aiyoo.
oh yeah. today while i was crying. i was just staring at stuff. and 2 words just appeared. not appeared. but yeah. like i saw. haha. cut. relief. i was like WOAH. okehh. that was ooba freaky can. sigh. yeah. i'm getting very stressed. all the more i need to pray and find God even more real in my life. like seriously. went for training today. man. super rusty. missed my squash mates. aww.
felt weird and like almost the same. a lot sounded the same. didn't feel the same though. duh right. yeah. but. sounded so much like. and it felt so weird when you talked about them. like from a different point of view. it's the same yet different. the topics are almost the same. yet it was so different. ahh.
so they said.
Tuesday, September 07, 2004
that was from sunday. i blogged. then the whole thing died. sooo pissed. that was only half lor. how irritating is that you tell me.
everybody's so busy and stressed. i'll be praying for you guys. poor everybody. i tell you. this holidays SUCK. like seriously. i haven't gone out. stupid squash is taking up so much of my study time. i'm OOBA irritated with it. ergh. anyway. today peter nicol. world number one squash player visited our school. how cool's that lor. seriously. i almost didn't want to go. cos i just came back from prefects's camp mah. super tired. then yeah. my mum forced me to go. in times like these my mum rocks. cos i would have regretted not going lor. whee. can i announce that i'm soooa annoyed. everytime i listen to the radio i miss the ooba nice songs. i just missed. like "i can be glad" by the brooklyn tabernacle choir. and the other time i missed testimony of love. ergh. hahah. i'm just pure suay.
sigh. OMG. i'm so stupid can. i feel like crashing into the wall and laughing and my stupidity. what can he do. he's not here! camille is so stupid. like SUPER. ahahahahahahahahaha. -dies-
yeah. i'm really REALLY extremely glad everything's ok between us now you know. i really thank God. cos without you. i don't know what i do. seriously. i thank God for you. :)
somehow everything will lead back someway. something will remind me of something.. deedum. i've almost stopped again. it's a vicious cycle which automatcally revives itself. ahh. dies. how now. there's no one. i totally forgot. and now nobody's here. :'( i'm scared. i guess you're right. ok. i KNOW you're right. but. ahh. Lord. help me.
woah. one person out of everyone i talked to is happy. haha. :) yeah. deedum. i'm really tired. yesterday screamed like siaodingdong. and i acted as mozart. mann. it was SO embarrassing. haah. everybody was like yelling eh camille! don't paiseh ah!! haha. i guess they expected me to do something crazy and funny again. wahaha.
i keep pressing enter and keep going to a new para. sorry. just feel whacky. anyway. so young already have boyfriend man! WOAH. ok. i'm reminding myself now. it hurts.
i'm back on my swearing thing. not as bad as last time. but still. shall stop. some people are sooo strong. wow. :)
so they said.
rachel is SO slow know. i think like it has been forever since he's been there. haha. and i hated you for giving me that face. I THOUGHT WHAT LAH. you pig. seriously. you really scared me. and i almost braked and tripped as i was running when i saw. plus you gave me a shock. dumdum. CHIMES WAS SOOO FUN. we were all so hyper. jojo, rach and i. my goodness. haha. min's the evil ice cream woman. and zhi hui's the evil clown. AHH. i hate clowns. they're sooo freaky. not that i hate zhihui. but she was giving me the evil clown face right after i had been freaked out by the evil ice cream woman. you know i think i'm going to get really bad nightmares. it's all jojo's fault. stupid jojo. she always puts this kinda freaky things in our heads like the other time when we were at rach's house she told us about the face at the window. woah. stupid jojo. making me cry all the time. anyway. during chimes we were reminiscing our crocodile dance. cos min reminded me of it. haha. it was hilarious. oh gosh. sorry min! :S we haven't gone that crazy in such a long time. i tell you. it's the stress.
did you notice the difference.
did you notice the INdifference.
haha. i hear pavarotti. yupp. long beard. can hardly see his face yeah. anyway. you realise i rarely look you in the eyes. cos i'm too scared. i hate it when you do that i really do. so stop it. cos it keeps reminding me of what rach said. about the trying to talk thing. ahh. it really freaks me out. ahh. please. sometimes i wish you'd go away. yet i don't. but you shouldn't have.
ahaha. why's everybody's nick's about love and all that stuff. eew. haha. sho funny. :) some people are just weird. CRAP. i just realised. noo. how suay. i really hope not.
until now you haven't kept a single promise know. ahah. which i think is quite funny. i hate the way you looked at me. you should have seen t hwee cheng's stare. WOAH. it was SUPER scary. i totally freaked out. i just realised i may have died.. like yeah!! heng.
sawah: hope you're ok babe. :) take care yeahh.
deedum. i love korey. korey= MYY guitar. i'm not possessive k. just that he's my first guitar.. haha. whee. tomorrow's sorta like a prefect's camp. and we're staying over in school. i want to bring my bible. but i think my mum would call me stupid. therefore i shall use my phone got all the verses inside. haha. yeah. and i'm soo going to bring ryan tomorrow. if not i'll get homesick. should i bring dylan too? i scared i get scolded by the prefect master. ergh.
Lord whatever You ask
i want to obey You
to let my life beat
with a servant's heart
Lord whatever You ask
i know that You can give me
wisdom and courage
to equal the task
Lord whatever You ask.
love the song. yupp. gee. i didn't know you were like that. and you know what. i don't like that side of you. sigh. i'm sorry. ok. i better go before i get scolded man. dies. yeahh. goodnight. i'm going to miss everybody. everything. i don't like going to sleep. cos it means tomorrow comes. this holiday isn't a holiday at all. deedum. nites. taa
so they said.
Sunday, September 05, 2004
all i typed is gone. nooo. :'( it was SOOO much. ahh. i only managed to save half of it. sigh.
so they said.
