some love.

Saturday, November 27, 2004

i'm in love, i'm in love, i'm in love, i'm in love. not really. i'm lying. haha. ((: can't stop thinking about all of you.

know how sometimes people have a knack for ruining your good moods. well, know what. you did it again today. and my good mood doesn't come back that fast. ARGH. -chases after good mood- please come back. bother. harumph. i'm not angry or being sarcastic its just that now i'm not all swoony and dreamy. i'm not going to stop chasing my good mood.

oh gosh. i'm so emotionally immature.

wish i was moree. bahumbug. i'm just going to sleep. taa.

so they said.

ALE-ALELUIA. LIFTYOURPRAISESHIGH.

lala. hello. my legs are dying.they're ULTRA tired. hee. practised like siao. tomorrow's everything pastor wants to see everything!! ahh. and t adelyn has to work. everybody's stressed. can you imagine aunty sally is so stressed, plus it doesn't help that she's MARRIED to pastor. haha. (: somehow no matter what aunty sally says, i still love her. cos i KNOW she cares. yupp. (:

outing at changi airport was fun. it changed SO much since the last time i've been there which is like billion years ago. seriously. everywhere you go is FOOD. yumm. i love food. haha. anyway. yeah. joyce, nigel and t lee lee. nigel's SO funny. he's like his brother. hahahahaha. really. joyce is just plain cute. -pinches cheek- always getting lost or having horrible sense of direction. t lee lee is good like seriously. as in figuring out the clues and stuff. had a great time. thanks sec 3 guys (: good job!

got new eye candy.

anyway. was looking at men hairstyles, so that my eye candy could change his and sweep me off my feet. yeah. and know WHAT. botak is a hairstyle? as in seriously. NO hair on his head. haha. i don't see how that is a hairSTYLE. humm. think it' s just mee.

one of the 5 sounds cool. no. 1 of the 5 rocks. grinns. (:

unfortunately i won't swoon for anybody except those 2. but yeah.

ogle.
1. To stare at.
2. To stare at impertinently, flirtatiously, or amorously

fine maybe i'll reserve my ogling for old men like colin firth who is in bridget jones diary's 2 WHICH I CANNOT WATCH! argh.

anyway whatever it was you gave my eyes a real treat. seriously. too bad i can't swoon for you. hee. i'm sorry.

humm. i see the full moon. which reminds me of many things. like the times we made our countless wishes. bum. haha. useless eh.

okay. it's quite late already. and tomorrow's going to be really tiring. and monday i've got training. i seriously can't wait for my 2 week break. of conference and japan. WOOT. hah! who cares. out of point. kk. shall go now. nitenite.

so they said.

Friday, November 26, 2004

WOOW.

haha. i didn't know. i'm dumb. no wonder haven't seen you. haha. lalalala. cam is incredibly slow. today was a beet hyper during training. xiang and i were laughing and laughing. poor becky. had to put up with us. haha. please you've told me ten billion times don't blab. and i haven't blabbed to anyone about you in your whole life. seroiusly. unless it's talking to xiang. since she already knows. wonder why. you don't mind when i don't tell you all my secrets and you don't get angry.

bah. whatever. anyway. HAHAH. i just dropped the phone. diao.

appearances. man. people judge soo much by appearances. haha. even little children. seriously. just watching people look at neoprints. everybody is soo judged. whether it's good or bad comments. haha. i hate being judged, especially MISjudged. then again who are we to judge eh. can't stand it. this lesson just goes round and round and round. isn't it unfair for those who aren't very good looking. wait. then again. if nobody judged, nobody would be good or not good looking right. um. HAHA. i rememer jojo's ugly baby theory. ooba funny. all the stupid jojo theories.

anyway. yeah. jojo. rach and i need a lift to church. hee. i was just about to ask rach for a lift when she asked me. i'm so proud of myself. i actually took bus home last night. hee. not that i haven't taken bus. but yeah. been driven lots around lately. getting scolded each time.

dance practice later. REJOICEREJOICEEMMANUELSHALLCOMETOTHEEOHISRAEL. haha. the first rejoice is like horrible. we never get onto the stairs in time. haha. then half the time i'm on the verge of collapsing on zhi hui. who's in front me. sorry. haha. and i'm so scared rach is going to fall on me. but it's very nice. just that i have never been able to see it properly.

ohman. is combined rehearsal pushed earlier to like this sunday? do they really NEED to stress t adelyn so much more.. i remember the first time we tried to perform. it was sooo tense. so sad. everybody was so close to despair. amazing you know. i definitely see the Lord here. (: thanks for showing me. yupp. i want to sleep before dancing hee. taa.

so they said.

Thursday, November 25, 2004

beeg hush.

lala. shhh. don't tell nobody.

bumbum. went to school. wasted my time. haha. not really. all we did was sing the same 3 songs over and over again. then we started singing christmas carols. HAHA. "hark the herald angels sing".

charismatic-ism is really VERY very VERY attractive know. seriously. i think one main part would be the music they produce. which is good. :S

today went to church for guitar lesson. our very first after like forever of trying to settle a date which all of us can make it. but yeah. qing yang couldn't make it. haha. it was quite funny. chio bu's soo cute. grinns. she was like. "eh, why no sound" hahahaha. they can both play the guitar so wellll. lahh. i'm attracted to guys who can play the guitar. really. but you'll forever top the charts. -swoons- x2 now. since there are 2 of you. hee. (:

there's really nobody. and i hated admitting it. like. i didn't even want to admit it to myself. like. ok. you are sorta out of the question. cos. cannot make it lah. i'll let you have the other. don't want to fight over you with friends. can you imagine.. i can't. makes me think of the yilin and kaixin. i just realised that i'm not the one who'd fight. just from far.. siigh. you, i'm not cut out eh. just me hoping.

one day is quite a lot. since we've got nothing to talk about. nothing in common. i feel like empty toothpaste being squeezed. aiyo. no. once again. i say i don't like flirts.

lalalalala. it's quite unhealthy. ooh. there's dance tomorrow. haha. just realised i haven't danced for quite a while. usually we practise like. how many times a week. ooh. iss outing on saturday! woot. i still wonder where we're going. where is there an aeroplane and a train. and lots of weird stuff. t chee keen is funny. i don't think it's airport. cos we're going to play. and we've been to airport once. and i don't think we'll be going there AGAIN. can you imagine if we're just going to play in church. haha. doubt it. kk. i better go and sleep. now. nitnite.

shhh. ;)

so they said.

speakers on.

haha. finallly learnt how to switch em on. thanks charlsesy. i'm sooo like umcomputerishy. yeah. anyway. so now. i'm actually able to listen to music. and i'm listening to emmanuel's light. i can feel the adrennaline pumping in me. and ow. too much adrennaline. got tummy ache. ok. song's over. yupp. CELEBRATE. woot. love the drumbeats. haha. -bangs head to music- SINGASONGOFCHRISTMASSINGASONGOFJOYANDCHEER. ahah. poor sop 2 can't get that part. grinns.

i'm in no way cut out to be a princess. but yeah. can't stop you from calling me that. can't stand flirts. really. *bish* lalala. anyway. i'd feel really awkward. haha. wow. you're really a true blue. *coughcough* man. but i wouldn't do that. talk about beraking tradition. hee. i won't. don't want to. but yeah. understandable. i guess. i hate making people feel uncomfortable. family camp. bah. haha. until now. my fault? i don't know. why does everybody say. once the feelings lost it can't come back. for example kaiwei and zhenkang. my 2 lovers. yeah. that's what they said. haiz. izzit like THAT true. that it'll never come back. "if you come back to me baby" what song is that? some really old boyband song. haha. lalala. don't know why i'm talking about this. hmm. neither does anybody. grinns.

haha. haven't talked to you for a long time. freaky freaky. haha. lalala. "no more broken hearts" dumdum. my lil brother doesn't want to tell me who he likes. like i don't already know. grinns.
right right. i shall talk about other stuff. for example how gross this macaroni i'm eating tastes.

lala. shall go now. taaa.

so they said.

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

yesterday was.

yeah. nice guitar. haha. rachel can't see it. poor girl. anyway. haha. both of us were at taka at the same time today. cool eh. i was shopping she was eating. it wasn't planned. yeah. we were both with our moms. and i saw SO many sc girls today. like SOO many. hah! i have FINALLY signed up for youth conference. hee. paid already just haven't sent in parental consent form thingy. and i can't print it out. haha. uh oh. i was telling t kenneth how i was going to go online and keep clicking the submit button. hehe.

anyway. today was psle results day day. yeah. and. i was so much more anxious than my brother. i wasn't really anxious. but he wasn't at all. so yeah. that makes me more anxious than him. HAHA. humm. yeah. he didn't do fantastically well but yeah. he's not very happy. oh. i'm not going to announce how much my bro got on the net. haha. sorry. yeah. he called me while i was on the phone with sonata. sorry charlsey. yeah. finally got the order fixed. i hope they come out alright. :S yeah. so now. i'm worried about which school he's going to. so difficult. want him to go to a good school. but i don't want him to become a poser. nor be looked down upon cos he's from st gabs. nor too stressed. cos everybody's good at something in that school. yeah. aiyo. and he's not going to a mixed school. cos girls do better than guys. so his morale will go down. mummy now wants him to go to maris stella. harumph. ewww. haha. HAHA. need to talk to him. but now, he's at my neighbour's house having a sleepover. like how lame is that. haha.

so piggy. so daooo. lala. ciao.

so they said.

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

no nuts.

actually there was, but who's complaining. haha. for the 11th time this year i was lying on my bed breathing "cramps" ahh. hate it. has anybody died during contractions before child birth. if not, i think i'll be the first.

went to church at 6. talked to pastor mark for half an hour. yay pastor mark. THANK YOU. for keeping me company. ahah. i was waiting for 3 people. how lame. yeah. came at 645. i was panicking at 633. so i smsed "the one who rocks" and people can do amazing things with 2 smses. love em. yeah. felt so weird measuring people. so sorry you had to come all the way down. haha. ohoh. i have to mention that waiting in the office was freaky. t kenneth was in his office laughing to himself and making weird noises like grunts and stuff. i was trying SOO hard not to laugh. haha. shouldn't disturb pastors. -nodnod- then left and waited what seemed forever for a cab to come. actually it think it was 5 mins. but i was so blinded by the glaring headlights i couldn't see the time. i tell you the percentage of people who are going to get blind will go up if everyone tries looking for an empty taxi to flag at night. and some don't even have those lights which say hired or taxi. yeah. so half the time i felt SO retarded flagging uncles and aunties driving past me. haha. ok. and why do you need such bright headlights when there are street lamps all over singapore. plus the moon.

star light star bright first star i see tonight i wish
i may i wish i might have the wish i wish tonight

i give up trying to figure out how to undo the stuff. haha. that's weird. i type in hugh grant and i got a picture of brad pitt. haha. so irritated that the edge of reason is nc16. i'm a good lil girl who won't sneak in. but doesn't change the fact that i'm angry. haha. colin firth is soo sexyyy. he kisses good eh. OMG. there's like a hugh grant calendar. wow. i like his wrinkles.. they just look good on him. haha. i'm swooning. everytime i think of the word swooning i think of just one person. haha. hee. shhh.

whoops. forgot to blog. i've just been staring at the SUPER sexy colin firth for the past half an hour. like he's 44 haha. and he has a son as old as me. haha. but he broke up with that wife and got 2 more sons which are like 1 and 2 years old. haha. love him. fell in love with him in pride and prejudice. woah. haha. he is the kind of guy who attracts me.

so dao sia. actually i don't care. whatever know. haha.

you'll forever rock.

so they said.

Monday, November 22, 2004

BAM.

haiz.went out.couldn't find.bothered everybody.trouble.my fault.

i'm so sorry everybody. i really didn't know the time. i didn't know we took so long. aiyoo. so tired. walked SO much. actually i didnt' know that ps was so near orchard knoww. haha. (: juicy gossip. but gross. i think i'm slow. anyway.

the more you're given the more is expected of you. the talents parable thing. ever since cherlyn told me right. it's stuck with me for like forever. expectations. i've been given so much. no wonder so much more is expected of me. the feeling of never being able to reach anybody's expectations suck. what a few titles can cause you. siiigh. how does one juggle. how does one cope. then again. our aim is to meet God's expectations not man's right. please the Lord not man. that verse too. yeah. though i know i'll never be able to meet God's expectations. He still loves me sooo much. i feel horrible. i didn't earn any of these blessings or love.

i'm soo drained. how in the world do you stay alive. why in the world do you stay alive. i'm stressed. cramps. everytime something crops up. i run away. i should be a long-distance runner man. lalala.

God, could i have wisdom? please? i want it bad. i need it bad. because they care. someone actually cares. it's SUPER painful to understand sometimes. thank you aunty sally. and i'm sorry i disappointed you. i didn't mean to. please forgive me for being so indignant. and self-centred. now i know it's because you care. when you said it, it didn't exactly register, but yeah. it does now.

so hard to swallow. sigh. love not the world. indeed a very apt theme.

so they said.