Saturday, February 26, 2005
turn to your friends. erm. yeah. what friends. damnit.
zhen xiang is very funny. if that's how you spell his name. i'll FOREVER remember how his animal was dinosaur. hee. i really want to get to know you better you know. i REALLLLY do. i really want to be more than just squealy. sigh. okay. you know you know. you don't.
don't go. not now.. please.
so they said.
Thursday, February 24, 2005
it'll cost me thiiiis much -streches arms reeeal wide- sometimes, i really REALLY wonder if it's worth it. you think? i don't know. i don't want to think. so what do i want? nobody really cares eh. it's what you want me to want. okay Lord. whatever You want. this week's bulletin, pastor said it's understandable that we find it hard to submit to other humans, but why should it be hard to submit to the Lord. yeah, cam. why? i don't know. i think i already blew my chances. so if i go back now. will it really change. you've already blackmarked me. i know you have. you can not show it, but i know you have. and sometimes, i wish you could tell fewer people. i really do. i'm lost. i'm just plain lost. am i directionless? think i am. probably am. sigh. You are THE way, THE truth and THE life. that life which i was meant to live. honestly, i don't see in me anything that could possibly be of any resemblence to any of them. i seriously don't think i'm cut out to be any. why do you all think so? is there something you can see that i can't? whatever it is. it's scaring me. it really is. cos i don't believe, i've NEVER believed in myself. never. i know i can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. but it really is very VERY weird. it's so weird it's freaky. so weird, that i don't believe i can do it at ALL. doubt floods all i do. all i want to do. i'm trying to hold on to everything that i call mine. hold on too tightly LIAOH. haha. singlish.
if i cough anymore i'll get a six pac.
okay. taa.
so they said.
Monday, February 21, 2005
man it's SO hard to love. it's so much easier to shoot all those who annoy me or hurt me. haha. we-ell. almost the whole world would be dead if i was in a bad mood then. hahaha. that's quite funny. like i don't like your face then BANG. heee. (: anyway. i'm sick. siigh.
not much to blog hahaha. i miss the holidays. i miss you. it's so on and off. i can't decide. you TOTALLY daoed me yesterday. it's okay. (:
so they said.
Sunday, February 20, 2005
four hundred bucks is a LOT for a lil girl like me. sigh. i wait long long eh. man. that's horrible english. anyway. yeah. (: i've got chinese test tomorrow. i haven't started on my homework. and i'm here! haha. i'm very good eh. haha. (: i found an amp which cost 52 bucks. WOW. but it's tiny. humm. don't think it's very reliable eh.
i love *beep* grinns. (:
anyway. it's soo sexeh. wooot. okie. i better go now. sigh. enough guitar gazing. taa. (:
so they said.
